Laugh for a while

*😀 Laugh for a while. A message roaming in Whats app😀*

The CMD of a Bank fell ill on a day when he had tickets to see a concert. As a gesture of kindness, he gave the tickets to the Bank's Inspection department head,so that the latter could enjoy  the musical performance with his wife.

Next morning, the CMD was surprised to find a report on his table, written by his Inspection Department head, and this is what it said:

"Dear Sir,

I was sent, by you, to  conduct a lightening and unannounced inspection of the concert. On entering the premises I only found only a few DCP's running here and there on the stage : the Branch in Charge nor any of his officers were found anywhere,while at the same time I found a lot customers waiting  in the hall.(Some of them looked like High Networth Individuals and could have been potential depositors. Needless to say no staff was seen attending to them ) .I was given a brochure by a person who looked like a daily wager.The brochure informed me that the main musical piece of the evening was to be Schubert's unfinished symphony, although personally I think that all work should always be finished even by keeping the branch open the whole night.

 I have watched the performance and here are some, but not all, of the irregularities, discrepancies and non -adherence to Circulars and ABM's , that I found:

1. The most obvious problem was that they had 22 violinists play the exact same tune! Such reckless waste! I believe that at least 21 of them should transferred to other branches in the North. 

2. The drummer was doing nothing for long stretches of time. I would suggest he be put on hundred percent variable salary ,  and only pay him when he actually does any work.

3. Many of the musical segments kept repeating themselves, and I fail to understand the point of having the flutes play the same segment as the oboes. If we can cut down on these repetitions, we can finish the symphony in 20 minutes instead of 2 hours.A circular needs to be issued on this by the HR department. 

4. Regarding the inventory and assets : I've noticed a horrible lack of stardanization when it comes to musical instruments, and especially when it comes to string instruments, I've seen small ones, big ones, and ones that you hold under your chin . I think that one size for all these instruments will save time, money and confusion, as well as make Annual maintenance easier.None of the assets were seen marked as mandated by numerous circulars from Admin Department. 

5. The conductor, the most senior employee, did not play as much as a single tune the entire concert, and showed a lack of respect to the customers, while standing with his back to the customers. There were even a few times he was threatening his staff with a stick, which should never be allowed. I would suspend him with no pay until we can get to the bottom of this. Psychological councling or suitable training programme may be advised.

Yours faithfully, 

Mr X, Head ,Inspection Department.